Fringe comedy debut: Rhys Nicholson

  • The List
  • 2 August 2013

This article is from 2013

Fringe comedy debut: Rhys Nicholson

Australian comedian appears for the first time at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival 2013

What do you think might work out as the best piece of advice you receive ahead of your Fringe debut?
I have had almost every comic who has been before say to me, ‘be OK with crying’.

What do you expect will be the least useful piece of advice?
Anyone who has ever said ‘drink scotch if you’re losing your voice’ is lying and intends for you to fail.

Imagine this is September: looking back at August, what would constitute a successful Fringe?
I’m really not sure. I am going into this with absolutely no expectations. A sentence under ten years?

In krugerrands, how much do you expect to lose during the Fringe?
Ergh, I just ran out of privatised South African gold, but if I still had some I would probably say four. Four krugerrands.

Back in the old days, there used to be a thing called ‘the festival shag’. Is this ancient tradition likely to play any part in your thinking during August?
I will be bringing my own carpeting to Edinburgh. That’s what you meant right? Right? Right you guys? Guys?

Back in the old days, comedians would drink alcohol solidly for a whole month and still manage to get out and do their show every day: how much are you likely to imbibe per day?
I will consume anywhere between 12–33 standard drinks over the course of each day. I find my performances are not so much effected my alcohol, but more perfected. Sobriety is for the weak and employed.

What qualities do you expect from a Fringe venue?
I like my venues like I like my men. Bright, moody and spatially accommodating.

Will you read your reviews before your run is over and if so, how do you think they will affect you as a comedian and as a human being?
In the words of the great and wise Roger Moore, ‘I’m used to bad reviews’. I always read reviews. If it’s bad, I tend to click over to, ‘well, fuck you then’ and the show gets better. If it’s good I get lazier, self-involved and impotent, for some reason.

Next year, will you consider returning as a double act?
I’d like to do a ventriloquist act with the shrunken head of Jimmy Savile.

Do you undertake any superstitious rituals before going on stage?
I like to have a double scotch, neat and usually about ten cigarettes over the hour before my show. And an 8 Ball.

If you were about to perform at the Fringe for your tenth year, where would you expect your career to be at that point?
A ten-year-old performing in a comedy festival? That seems a little inappropriate. I mean, that’s impressive I guess. But that kind of party culture just isn’t healthy for a child that age. That’s the problem with society these days. Kids aren’t allowed to be kids anymore.

Gilded Balloon Teviot, 622 6552, 3¬–26 Aug (not 13), 10.45pm, £10.50–£11.50 (£9.50–£10.50). Previews 31 Jul–2 Aug, £5.

Triple j Raw Comedy 2009- Rhys Nicholson

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