Fringe 2011 comedy blogs - Marcel Lucont
- Marcel Lucont
- 10 August 2011
This article is from 2011.
The chat show hosts dispenses advice on how to keep your cool
Every year at the Edinburgh Festival I am asked, 'Marcel, how do you maintain this air of carefree nonchalance during such an intense month? Surely, given the high standard of your shows, the pressure increases annually?'
I reply, 'That is Monsieur Lucont to you, and I asked for a large red. Keep the change. And here is my phone number. See you in the Meadows.'
But the question is a good one, and I shall strive to give an honest reply.
A boxer may resist sexual intercourse and narcotics for several months before his big performance, but I have found the exact opposite provides the best result in my case. I must still make sure I am working on material in between bouts, of course.
If there is someone not understanding my show, or clearly out to give me a bad review as a kind of personal vendetta (I can think of no other reasons), it is so important to remember that as a being I am infinitely better than them in every way. Have they invested thousands in order to enrich others' lives? No, they have not. Have they written a book to improve others' lives (What We French Think Of You British... And Where You Are Going Wrong, £6.99 from New Holland Publishers)? Of course not. Have they wrenched the depths of their soul to give a brash critique of erectile dysfunction (No Hard Feelings)? I doubt it very much.
Managing one's connections
It is important, of course to remember the names and faces of those who in previous years have provided opportunities, alcohol and / or sex at the festival. For the latter, if the woman in question is of a cabaret or circus background, it certainly pays to recall her correct identity and name when clothed. Many of them can breathe fire or have access to swords.
Life exists beyond, and after this Festival. When the final show has ended to rapturous applause, the final drink has been finished in a regrettable establishment 14 hours later, and the final member of the flyering team has left my boudoir, we return to the realities of the world, namely that the world is largely run by idiots for idiots, that our craft is still for a relatively niche market, and that the only thing remaining when the bomb eventually detonates will be bankers and cockroaches.