Blondes (3 stars)

This article is from 2009.


Denise has more fun

Blondes is exactly what you’d expect it to be like. Graham Norton on voiceover introduces Denise! Van! Outen! and with a razzle-dazzle and a boop-boop-be-doop she shimmies her way onto the stage, belts her way through hits from Dusty, Madonna, Britney and, of course, Blondie, shows some family photos, reveals a little about her own heartbreaks and banters saucily with an audience who clearly adore her.

Some of the humour seems forced: jokes about apartheid seem to have come from co-writer Jackie Clune’s pen and sit rather awkwardly in our gal Den’s mouth, and it takes her a rather stilted 15 minutes to ease her way into her script at first. There’s also the odd bit of product placement slipped in there: we’re pretty sure other supermarkets are available.

However, there’s no denying that she’s got a splendid set of pipes on her. She puts her all into every song, seems completely at her ease talking honestly in front of an audience, and there’s a nice little story about Bonnie Tyler and a toilet brush that should tickle the faithful.

Udderbelly’s Pasture, 0844 545 8252, until 31 Aug (not 25), 5.50pm, £13.50–£14.50 (£12.50–£13.50).


  • 3 stars

West End and Broadway diva, TV star, fashion icon, Essex girl. Denise Van Outen will sing and talk all things peroxide, channelling her favourite blondes - from Dolly to Dusty to Duffy. Top tunes. Top jokes. Blondes have more fun - official.

Post a comment