Edinburgh Festival theatre day-planner

  • The List
  • 23 July 2009

This article is from 2009.

Theatre Day Planner

Keen to see some great theatre but not sure where to start? We help you map out your Fringe-going day, from morning to midnight


Heroin(e) for Breakfast
If you need a pre-noon hit to get you going then try out this morning cocktail of sex, drugs, and Marilyn Monroe. Underbelly, 08445 458 252, 8–30 Aug (not 17), 11.40am, £6.50–£10 (£8–£9). Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £6.

Tap and Chat with Lionel Blair
Dancing, singing, and anecdotes from a 60-year career in the razzle-dazzle industries. Sweet Grassmarket, 0870 241 0136, 7–9, 13–16, 20–23, 27–30 Aug, 11.45am, £12 (£10).


Story of a man obsessed with The Texas Chainsaw Massacre – an interest with obvious drawbacks. Underbelly, 08445 458 252, 8–15 Aug, 12.15pm, £6.50–£10 (£8–£9). Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £6.

Bob’s Date
For the first time in two years, Bob has a date. Which, unfortunately for him, is taking place on stage. C soco, 0845 260 1234, 5–22 Aug, 12.30pm, £7.50–£9.50 (£6.50–£8.50).

Almost 10

Comic monologue for adults about a nine-year-old who is neither sweet, delicate, nor polite. Pleasance Courtyard, 556 6550, 8–31 Aug (not 18, 25), 12.55pm, £7–£8 (£5.50–£6.50). Previews 5–7 Aug, £5.


George in the Dragon’s Den
Panto meets Monty Python in a topical updating of the classic legend.
Zoo Southside, 662 6892, 9–31 Aug, 1pm, £6.50–£8 (£5). Previews 7 & 8 Aug, £4.

Fear and Misery of the Third Reich
Series of short plays by Brecht about the build-up to World War II. Sweet ECA, 0870 241 0136, 7–16 Aug, 1.15pm, £7.50 (£6.50).

Facebook Fables
It was only a question of time before Facebook went onstage. A topical tale for all you closet taggers, pokers, and cyber romantics. Gilded Balloon Teviot, 622 6552, 8–31 Aug (not 15, 18), 1.45pm, £9–£10 (£7–£8). Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £5.


Me Too – A Sideshow
Puppet show about the trials and tribulations of showbiz Siamese twins Daisy and Violet. New Town Theatre, 0844 477 1000, 7–30 Aug (not 17), 2pm, £11–£12 (£9–£10). Previews until 6 Aug, £7.50.

Destination GB
Farcical and deadly serious take on illegal immigration. Bring your passport!
Pleasance Courtyard, 556 6550, 8–31 Aug (not 17, 24), 2.05pm, £8–£9 (£6.50–£7.50). Previews 5–7 Aug, £5.

The Rap Guide to Evolution
Could you work australopithecus afarensis into a rap? Baba Brinkman can. Darwin for the 21st century. Gilded Balloon Teviot, 622 6552, Aug 7–31, 2.45pm, £8–£9 (£7–£8). Previews until 6 Aug, £5.


The Puppet-Show Man
Hans Christian Anderson’s fairytales brought to life. The Spaces on the Mile @ The Radisson, 0845 508 8316, 7–22 Aug (not 9, 16), 3.05pm, £6.50 (£5.50).

Oscar Wilde’s Lord Arthur Saville’s Crime
‘The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast’. Imagine what fun Wilde would have had writing reviews of the Edinburgh Fringe. Laughing Horse @ The Counting House, 667 7533, 7–19 Aug, 3.10pm, free. Preview 6 Aug.

The Sound of My Voice

Well-reviewed play about a suburban alcoholic who runs a biscuit factory, based on Ron Butlin’s beautiful novel.
Assembly Rooms, 623 3030, 8–30 Aug (not 17), 3.20pm, £11–£12 (£9–£10). Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £5.


The Gannet
Surreal coming-of-age odyssey inspired by Hansel and Gretel. Pleasance Dome, 556 6550, 8–31 Aug (not 18), 4pm, £7–£8 (£5.50–£6.50). Previews until 7 Aug, £5.

With Arms Outstretched
Does Valentine’s Day brings you out in a cold sweat? This comedy promises love, fear, and annoying waiters. The Grape, 557 4522, 8–14 Aug, 4.30pm, free.

Words with AL Kennedy
New show from the Costa award-winning writer. Assembly Rooms, 623 3030, 9–31 Aug (not 17, 24), 4.50pm, £9–£10 (£8–£9). Previews 6–8 Aug, £5.


The Self-Murder
Two young people make a suicide pact over the internet, then meet up to carry it out. C central, 0845 260 1234, 7–31 Aug (not 18), 5.25pm, £7.50–£9.50 (£6.50–£8.50).

Playback Theatre
Improvisational show – bring along a life story and see it acted out before your eyes.
Diverse Attractions, 225 8962, 9–14 Aug, 5.30pm, £6 (£5).

Miss Landmine
Based on the life story of Miss Landmine 2008, Augusta Urica, winner of Angola’s beauty pageant with a difference.
Underbelly, 08445 458 252, 8–30 Aug (not 17), 5.45pm, £6.50–£10 (£8–£9). Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £6.


Three castaways fight each other and themselves in search of redemption. Adapted from Sartre’s No Exit.
Underbelly, 08445 458 252, 8–30 Aug (not 19), 6.10pm, £6.50–£10.50 (£8–£9.50). Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £6.

Manband – They’re Not a Boyband
Title seems pretty self-explanatory. Manbags at the ready. Sweet ECA, 0870 241 0136, 8–31 Aug, 6.35pm, £9–£10 (£8–£9). Previews 6 &7 Aug, £6.

The Canterbury Tales
Once again, Geoff Chaucer’s travellers set out on pilgrimage. Will they reach Canterbury this time? Answers on a postcard, please. C too, 0845 260 1234, 6–31 Aug (not 18), 6.45pm, £8.50–£10.50 (£5.50–£7.50).


Comedy about copying ideas in the creative industries. Go along and judge it for originality. New Town Theatre, 0844 477 1000, 7–30 Aug (not 16), 7pm, £10 (£8). Previews until 6 Aug, 7pm, £5.

Does this Piano Make My Ass Look Big?
Risqué cabaret songbird with a tale of addiction and sexual experimentation. The Bongo Club, 557 2827, 7–29 Aug (not 10, 17, 24), 7.20pm, £8 (£6).

Prose and poetry, different every evening.
Fingers Piano Bar, 8–29 Aug, 7.50pm, free.


Gregor Samsa wakes up to find he’s turned into a beetle. Adapted from Kafka’s seminal story. C too, 0845 260 1234, 6–31 Aug (not 18), 8pm, £8.50–£10.50 (£5.50–£9.50).

The Revenant
Sombre one-man show about the impossibility of return to one’s past.
Spotlights @ The Merchants Hall, 220 5911, 9–15 Aug, 8.45pm, £8 (£5).

Boy in darkness
Multimedia adaptation of Mervyn Peake’s Gormenghast novella. The Zoo, 662 6892, 9–22 Aug, 8.45pm, £8.50–£9 (£8–£8.50). Previews 7 & 8 Aug, £6.


Certain Dark Times
Critically acclaimed storytelling company.
Underbelly, 08445 458 252, 8–30 Aug (not 17), 9.05pm, £6.50–£12.50 (£9–£11). Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £6.

And All The Children Cried
Theatrical investigation into mothers killing their children. Sweet Grassmarket, 0870 241 0136, 6–30 Aug (not 17), 9.30pm, £9 (£8).

Bedtime Stories
Comfy pillows, Fairtrade cocoa. dark comedic shorts. C cubed, 0845 260 1234, 6–31 Aug (not 18), 9.45pm, £7.50–£9.50 (£6.50–£8.50).


A Clockwork Orange

Anthony Burgess’s classic novel adapted for stage. Fresh from a sell-out Oxford run. C Chambers Street, 0845 260 1234, until 22 Aug, 10pm, £8.50–£10.50 (£7.50–£9.50).

Doctor Faustus
The Edinburgh International Festival is putting on an operatic Faust. If you prefer your depravity Elizabethan, try this ‘risqué adaptation’ of Marlowe’s classic. The Zoo, 662 6892, 9–22 Aug, 10.30pm, £7.50 (£6.50). Previews 7 & 8 Aug, £6.50

Showstopper! The Improvised Musical
Extremely well-reviewed show which keeps buzzing night after night.
George Square Theatre, 226 0000, 8–30 Aug (not 18, 24), 10.50pm, £10.50–11.50 (£9.50–£10.50). Preview 7 Aug, £7.


Ballad of the Skull Fairy
‘Rolicking phantasmagoria’ from the creators of Bouncy Castle Hamlet.
Underbelly, 08445 458 252, 8–15 Aug, 11pm, £6–£10 (£8–£9). Previews 6 &7 Aug, £5.

Hooked (Musical)
Young, charming PR goes off the rails under the pressures of work, drugs, and family. George Square Theatre, 651 1292, 9–30 Aug (not 11, 17, 24), 11.15pm, £9.50–£10.50 (£7.50–£8.50). Previews 7 & 8 Aug, £6.


Meesterlijk – showcasing the best of Dutch theatre
A selection of theatre handpicked by the Dutch Cultural Attaché. All dykes and Edam? Head to the GRV at the witching hour and find out. The GRV, 226 0000, 8–15 Aug, 12.20am, £5. Previews 6 & 7 Aug, £2.50.

The Gannet

A surreal odyssey. Clashing siblings discover a dark forest and soon succumb to strange temptations. Manoeuvred by a ravenous eye, can they escape taboo-breaking beasts and sugar-coated enemies? 'Captivating... superb performances' (Evening News). Watch trailer: www.fatcontent.org.

Clockwork Orange

Critically-acclaimed adaptation of Anthony Burgess's original playscript arrives at the Fringe from a sell-out Oxford run. Confronted with the brutality of a totalitarian society, you must decide for yourself who the real victims are. www.aclockworkorange.org.uk

Ballad of the Skull Fairy

A mighty rollicking fantasmagoria of murder, betrayal, good, evil, skulls, tibias, giant squids, arm-flailing, and obscene poems from the West Country! From the creators of 'Bouncy Castle Hamlet'. 'Genius' (Metro). 'Triumphant success' (Guardian). Hurray!

Miss Landmine

Angola. A unique beauty contest. The prize - a golden prosthetic limb and the title, Miss Landmine. Using fact and fiction, the story of Augusta Urica, contest winner, and the landmine which maimed her, from invention to explosion.

And All the Children Cried

  • 3 stars

Myra and Gail are in prison. Their crimes? Killing children. Written by Judith Jones and Beatrix Campbell, this new young production tells stories of the dark places we tend to think should never be brought to light. Directed by Alexa Christopher-Daniels

Boy in Darkness

  • 2 stars

As a young boy's birthday draws to a close, he surveys the endless stone labyrinth he calls home and decides to escape. Titus Groan, the 77th Earl of Gormenghast, has been surrounded by forgotten rooms and perplexing ritual for fourteen years and he can’t stand it anymore. Projection, puppetry, and an unsettling…

Doctor Faustus

“Cut is the branch that might have grown full straight...” Zig-Zag creations are proud to present this risqué adaptation of Marlowe’s classic. Radically re-written by award winning writer James Wilkes, Doctor Faustus is a non-purist portrayal of a man damned by his thirst for power. Utilising the traditions of burlesque…


Want to hear a story? Punchy prose and poignant poetry, featuring spoken word from Edinburgh and beyond. A different show each evening, always free. Some open slots. Check the programme at www.underword.co.uk. Come every night.

Bedtime Stories

  • 3 stars

Dark, comedic shorts showcasing new British writers in their element. As we move between daydreams, nightmares and fairytales, sit back on our comfy pillows with free Fairtrade cocoa. It's about time there were 'Bedtime Stories' for grownups. www.thejollymilkman.com

Showstopper! The Improvised Musical

New musical improvised nightly. Audience suggestions collide with the inspired comic imaginings of an all-singing, all-dancing cast. Sell-out 2008. 'Must be seen to be believed' (Time Out - Critics' Choice). 'Just sublime' (Scotsman). www.showstopperthemusical.com

Showstopper! The Improvised Musical- Special Guest Matinees

A new musical improvised daily. Audience suggestions collide with the inspired comic imaginings of an all-singing, all-dancing cast. Guest stars will be announced first to our email list. Join at www.showstopperthemusical.com.


A vibrantly addictive new musical from the team behind legendary Guinness commercials alongside Max Kinnings, Rik Mayall's writing partner. Ben is sucked into an intoxicating world of forbidden pleasures causing damage hard to repair. Everyone's hooked on something...

Doctor Faustus

Oxford University Dramatic Society retells Marlowe's timeless tale. Faustus breaks the boundaries of knowledge, seeking a brave new world and narrating his own decline as he explores reality and illusion, past and present, the sacred and the profane.

Manband - They're Not a Boyband

  • 3 stars

A musical (kind of). They can't sing. They can't dance. They can't play. They're gonna be stars. 'Manband - They're Not a Boyband'. New show from acclaimed writer Stuart Price: 'imaginative... technically polished' (Fringe Report).

Meesterlijk - Showcasing the Best of Dutch Theatre

  • 3 stars

Thought Dutch culture was all Edam and tulips? Prepare to be surprised. Handpicked by the Dutch Cultural Attaché, this is funny, dark, and a perfect late night introduction toDutch theatre.

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